The Whist Drive

Everyone pauses!

“I’m going to run out the french windows, with my big fat tits bouncing, my bum jiggling, and frigging my clit as I go. And I’m going to go round and round the croquet course. And the first guy that catches me can do whatever he likes to me.”

“That’s great!” says Bill. “On yer marks, Dolly, lass.”

And Dolly bends down, with her beautiful bottom spread wide and her anus getting plenty of air.

“Get ready…..Go!”

And Dolly runs out of the french windows so slowly that Bert catches her before she’s even got off the terrace.

Which only leaves Diana.

Diana says: “Hey everyone, I want a fuck too, you know! But I’m a respectable married woman, so I can’t play the field like Marj and Dolly and Veronica. When I want a good stiff fucking, I go to Bill.”

Which she now does, on all fours, with her hind legs prettily splayed. (We’ve seen Diana’s cunt tonight from every possible angle!) Then Diana kneels up at Bill’s feet; spills out her tits on his lap; holds up her front paws beseechingly; lets her tongue hang out; and barks: “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

“Nice doggy” says Bill, feeling Diana’s breasts. “I’ll slip you a big bone later. Now play at being Dolly’s maid again.”

“OK, Bill, but I’ll be back!” says Diana. “And I’ll be keeping you up all night!” She jumps to her feet, knockers and buttocks bouncing merrily.

Diana turns to Bill’s next door neighbour, Harry Chuff. Diana stands before Harry thoughtfully; hands on hips and legs astride. She sticks her tits in Harry’s face; rummages around on his lap, compliments Harry enthusiastically on what she finds there; and then puts her tongue into Harry’s mouth. Diana doesn’t believe in playing hard to get when she sees an attractive guy.

Having got Harry’s attention, Diana then gets down to brass tacks. She kicks her long right leg up high and hooks it over the back of Harry’s chair. As Diana’s long left leg is planted on the carpet in front of Harry, he now gets an incredible view of quivering randy mature female flesh. In particular, Harry’s nose is now one inch away from the Fortescue-Slagg cunt. “Look, Harry, it’s all real, isn’t it. Have a lick!”

Harry can hardly resist such a charming invitation. His moustache and Diana’s pubes come together, and loud licking and spluttering noises ensue.

Harry is obviously pretty good in this kind of situation, because he quickly finds Diana’s hot button. Diana’s lovely perma-tanned back begins to arch; she grinds her breasts together; and she shouts “Albert, that’s fucking marvellous!” (On the other side of the room, Albert Jugg spits out his beer in shock.)

Harry doesn’t seem put off by Diana’s gaffe. Or maybe he can’t hear too well, as his ears are being clamped by Diana’s superb thighs. Harry keeps on doing what he’s doing, and Diana is happy for him to continue.

The loving couple slide on to a more comfy position on the floor. Now Diana really loses her inhibitions! Her crotch bucks violently but Harry’s face stays in the saddle. Diana bellows and drools and pulls her hair. She convulses with spasm after spasm. And then she totally loses her grip....

Diana lies on the carpet for a while. Her breasts heave up and down as she takes huge juddering breaths. Her nipples stand up like little strawberries.

Diana’s legs are wide open, with her knees slightly up. Not the most elegant position, maybe, but it does allow some cool air to play over her throbbing cunt. Naked, oozing and knackered, Diana looks like the ‘after’ picture in a Viagra advert.

As Diana props herself up on her elbows and slowly opens her eyes, she sees six fascinated faces in the ‘V’ between her legs.

Ever the gracious hostess, Diana quickly recovers her poise. “Thank you …errr….Harry, that was delightful! I was really impressed! Perhaps we could meet up again some time?..... Now, everybody, where were we?”

Where indeed? Well, while Diana has been taking time out to get her cunt licked, the other Whist Club ladies have been busy.

Marjorie has had her shower, and is now holding court in the master bedroom. A rhythmic thumping through the ceiling, plus the occasional squeal, give you an idea of Marjorie’s pulling power.

Marjorie has turned out to be the surprise hit of the party. It seems a long time ago now, but it was Marjorie’s extraordinary tit-wobbling antics that first broke the ice.

And every guy here has been shafted at some point by Marjorie’s disastrous financial advice. So why not return the favour and shaft Marjorie back? As a result, there is a long queue of gentlemen callers for Marjorie. With some people like Joe Worsley hoping for a second helping.

In fact, all’s fair in love and war. So Joe has ‘taken steps’ to ensure he sees plenty more of Marjorie and her special brand of naked slapstick. He’s carefully locked her clothes in the boot of his car and has commandeered the jug of whipped cream.

In the conservatory, the Cocksucker is definitely ‘IN’. Veronica is slurping and gobbling her way through the male guest list.

Veronica’s still experimenting with the best ‘dating technique’ but she’s already found the most satisfactory position. Which is:-
• The gentleman sitting comfortably in an armchair, beer and woodbines to hand;
• The lady naked on all fours between the gentleman’s knees;
• The lady’s thighs well apart; bottom waggling; and cunt steaming gently, from the occasional tweak of the lady’s spare hand;
• A series of mirrors positioned behind the fair lady, so that the gentleman can get a good rear view.

This position seems to be giving full satisfaction to every bloke at the party. It’s also helpful to Veronica, in that she gets a good throughput of callers that way. Have you ever been treated to a really juicy bottom-and-cunt splay, at the same time as you get a blow-job? (I haven’t, but I’ve been told.) Apparently it does limit your staying power.

In the case of Fred Hasty, Veronica got herself in position; did a preliminary cunt stretch in the mirror for Fred’s benefit; opened her mouth to brightly enquire: “shall I swallow, spit or take it in my face, Fred?” – and got a great wad of spunk in her chops.

Choke! Cough! Gasp! “Err…I guess that means all of the above, Fred?”

Anyway, truth to tell, Veronica was getting a bit bored with all this. She was getting lockjaw! Ted and Eric, who’d been Veronica’s first clients are hanging on faithfully. They’d been very impressed by Veronica’s off-the-cuff comment about Cheltenham Ladies College. “First you date, then you fuck, eh?” We want one of them Ladies Colleges round here.

Ted and Eric have both had a very nice ‘date’. They still have the lipstick on their cocks to prove it. Now they (and Veronica) are eagerly waiting for the fucking to begin. Only three more cocks to suck!

Meanwhile Dolly is having a lovely romantic time under the stars. First Jim had shafted her very thoroughly in the long grass by the rhododendrons. He really got her legs wrapped round his back!

Then Dolly staggered over to the rose bushes and Bert did her there. That was a bit of a non-event because Bert, bless him, was so excited that he came immediately.

So while waiting for the gentlemen to recover, Dolly is frigging herself under the stars. Very nice, and oh look, there’s Jim’s ‘Big Dipper’.

Back to Diana now, and only just in time! “Look what the maid’s found here, everyone!”

And Diana runs over to pulls out a drawer of assorted vibrators and dildos!

“Isn’t Dolly a greedy girl! What a lot of nice toys, but they’ve got a bit rusty. Now the maid will have to polish all these old toys, with her own cunt juice. Ha ha, it’s a hard life, isn’t it! Who wants to watch me?!!”

End of the party

Diana finds herself at last with the Africans, who had been intriguing her all evening. Now she could have wished for a better way to first meet them. Because Diana Fortescue-Slagg is splayed, cunt-dripping nude, in the drawing room. With her elegant legs hooked over each arm of her chair, and a red dildo probing her clit. Which does tend to put you at a social disadvantage.

But Diana’s not feeling very shy, so she beckons the Africans over. They sit down in front of her, a bit pop-eyed. Diana meets them halfway, by thrusting up her crotch.

“You gentlemen are not locals, are you?” Diana enquires.

“No, madam, we are visitors to England. We come from a small island in the Indian Ocean – Coksf’yoo..”

“Cocksf’yoo!!” Diana practically orgasms.

“Yes, we have come to England on a fact-finding mission from our island’s government. Wealthy English women are an important tourist demographic for us.”

This is the most interesting news Diana has heard all evening. In her excitement, she gives the dildo a big thrust; shudders with a great wave of pleasure; and collapses back into her chair.

The Africans courteously wait while Diana tugs the dildo out, with a squelching pop. Prone in the chair, Diana squirms her fanny about; kicks her legs in the air; and finally regains her balance; tits bouncing.

Having regained her composure, Diana gives the Africans a dazzling smile; opens her legs as wide as they can possibly go; and thrusts her wet cunt under their noses.

“Ah yes, and what are your impressions of English women?” she simpers.

“Errr...we have never seen anyone to match them, madam” the African replies. “In fact, we are thinking of making you and your friends a special offer.”

“Oh, how charming!” says Diana, practically standing on her head and doing the splits, as she tries to envelope their faces in her pouting fanny.

“Yes, madam, we are having a little party tomorrow night. How would you ladies like to ‘perform’ there? I can make it worth your while! My government has authorised me to offer you each ..... a digital camera!”