Posted by Kim It's good very cute.
Posted by LucOuarm Work on dialogue spacing for future efforts, but this first story was a good effort.
Posted by Xander Very nice a few typos here and there but other wise nice context and all. You shoud definetly make a part 2 it has potential.
Posted by G. Lucas Good story, well written and I like how it all mixes passion and desire. Check some of mine out and tell me what you think, please.
Posted by Ark Kaiser Thx for the input everyone... Haven't shown up around here for a while... working on more stuff.. but thanks for the input
Posted by michelle i liked this story alot...