This is my story

(Part 1 from 1)

All my life I've waited or someone to come to me that would ignite a passion in me that could only be felt as love. And every man I've ever known hasn't been able to give me that. This is my story, this is my song. 

Her name was Anna. We were both young and had little understanding of love. She was about 5-4, normal weight, with the most gorgeous, creamy pale skin, her hair was a light brown, and she had these incredibly sensuous eyes. Eyes that seemed to draw me in and hold me there wondering what it was that she thought and what she saw in me. She also had the most arousing accent I've ever heard. She was born in Russia, and never told me when she came to America. 

We went to the same school, and we were fast friends. The first time, we ever talked it felt like I was being opened up. My heart was exposed, and for the brief flash that it was exposed she stepped in. Granted that we were both inexperienced what we felt was a bit on the childish side. 

I always waited for her to get to school, because we had the same first period. That day she was a little late, and as I waited I thought back to how she looked everyday, I was still imagining her face when she walked up and tapped me on the shoulder. She looked sad and I could tell she had been crying. 

'Anna what's wrong,' I asked her she just shook her head and refused to reply. Instead of pressuring her further I just opened up my arms. As she stepped into them and leaned against me it seemed that she fit perfectly. Her head reached to just under my ear and her nose nestled softly against my cheek. At that moment I just wanted to hold her and make the world go away, so she could be happy again. We were good friends and I started to realize just how much I cared for her. I loved her eyes, her smile, the way she switched to Russian when she didn't want me to understand her, loved the way she always knew how to do my math homework before I could read the problem. 

Realizing that something had made her cry hurt more than anything else I could remember had, I knew that I felt more than just friendship for this girl who had made it past my defenses. As she began to speak the tardy bell rang and our teacher stuck his head out to, tell us we were late. I turned and told him we'd be in but I needed to talk to Anna. He asked me why and I looked at him and said, 'You don't want me to answer that, of course he took it to mean Girl Trouble' but that was my intention. Anna had stopped speaking and as I lifted her head to look at her I uttered three words. 


' Talk to me'

She started out slow her accent heightening her allure; ' my dads Visa expired and we might have to go back to Russia.' She told me then she started talking about how her parents were stressed, and she started to get a little more angry as she began to talk about how they were taking the money she earned babysitting, and telling her she needed to buy her own clothes. By the time she got to the part about her yelling at her parents, she had slipped into Russian. As she spoke I found it difficult to focus on her words; instead I watched her eyes. Their normally cool cerulean color was iced over and much harder, with flecks of a color I didn't know. 

Letting go of her body, I grabbed her hand and gently led her to the bathroom, she had stopped talking and I asked her the most simple question I could think of considering the emotions I felt. ' What do you want me to do'' All she said was 'is my friend.' Then she started to cry. There was nothing I could do, it seemed as if her world was going to end, she told me that she would rather die then go back to Russia. I grabbed her and hugged her close to me rocking her gently, just praying that she would be able to stay. Selfishly thinking how much I would miss her. I wanted to tell her that I loved her and tell her I would do anything to keep her from going back. But, she needed a friend not someone so infatuated and in love they couldn't think straight. As she began to calm down, I tilted her head up to look at me, and planted one very soft kiss on her forehead, right between her eyebrows. She smiled at me and said, ' Kiss it makes it better' and I just laughed and nodded. We got some tissue and she wiped her eyes, and said' 'We'd better get to class we're 20 minutes late.' 'Actually 25' I replied. As I turned to walk out the room she grabbed my hand, and entwining her fingers with mine, led me out the doors. 

As we strolled into the classroom hand in hand, she leaned over and said, ' Thanks Trace' I just smiled and gave her hand a squeeze before I let it go and went to my desk. People were snickering and making comments, but, I was not a person to be challenged then, so I simply said, ' let it go, it's none of your business.' From that day on we walked into class everyday hand in hand, sometimes she would come over, and sit on my lap and talk to me when we were supposed to be working. I didn't get to act on my feelings, until a month later. I was ditching 7th period, and I walked out the door and ran smack into her on the way out of school. She grabbed my hands and entwined our fingers, pulling me closer, she said, ' I need to talk to you.' We walked around holding hands and she told me that she cared a lot for me, and wasn't sure that it was just a friendship kind of thing. We had talked about being more than friends and the rumors were that we were lesbians, but people knew better than to openly gossip about me and anyone I protected. We were back where we had started when she asked ' how do you feel about me' But, I thought to myself, how do you explain love. How do you describe the feeling I get when she snuggles against me when I give her a hug, or the beats my heart skipped when she would say my name. The gut wrenching pains at the thought of people making fun or her or teasing her, and making her sad. We had stopped walking and were standing about two inches apart. As I was slightly taller she looked up and I looked down. Looking into her eyes I felt lost, I was so utterly swept away, that she saw the answer in my eyes. Cupid's entire quiver of arrows had found its way into my heart. Just looking at her made me feel special, but I looked at her and took her hands in mine and I said nothing. But, I didn't have to, because she knew. We could communicate without uttering a single word, we must have stood there for awhile, because the drama teacher had sent a student out to look for me. When Amanda came out and saw us just standing there she said ' Oh.. you guys really are lesbians,' tearing my eyes from Anna's I looked at her and said, 'walk away, and don't come back.' If looks could kill she would have dropped on the spot. 

Looking back at Anna, said ' I love you,' She smiled and nodded at me before she said ' I think I love you too.' She looked up at me shyly, this girl who could be as outspoken as I suddenly had nothing to say. I saw love in her eyes, and I just bent down and planted a soft kiss on her lips. They were, smooth, and very warm. I pulled her against me and kissed her again. She responded in a way I didn't expect. She pulled away from me and looked into my eyes. I must have looked scared, I was frightened that I had taken her to far. She smiled and held me close, so I just nuzzled my chin in her hair and held her. ' kiss me again' she whispered. naturally I obliged and peppered her mouth with soft kisses. We were standing in the hall of a school to close together for the Holy Ghost to get thru, and holding hands. I stopped kissing her mouth and pressed my lips to her forehead. She pulled back and kissed me on the bottom lip. She let her tongue dart out and touch my lip. I felt shudders go through me and forgetting where we were I gently probed her lips with my tongue, she tasted like spearmint, we were both fanatical gum chewers. She opened her mouth and probed my tongue with hers, tentatively though, but, this was new to us both. There were less than 3 minutes left to the end of the school day and here we were making out in the hallway what more could I have asked for. As the inevitable approached we both said, we needed to stop but, neither of us was willing. We were still kissing when Amanda, who obviously, hadn't gotten the message the first time came out to tell me that Mr. Butler wanted to see me after school. ' Holy Shit, are you guys making out.' I ignored her and then pulled out of Anna's grip and kissed her on the forehead and sent her back to class. As she walked away, she turned and called out ' I do love you' I grinned and said, ' I love you to babe'

Amanda who was still standing there gasped, ' you guys are dating, and making out in the halls, jeez this is so weird.' 

Looking at her I said ' I have no desire to hear about this being weird, and if word gets to me that you told people what you just saw, I will make you sorrier than you can imagine. And if anyone teases her about it, or hints that they know, I will hold you responsible and, I will make you wish you had never met me. Understood.' She nodded at me, ' then get the fuck out of here and don't talk about this. We continued our relationship until graduation, and then the shit hit the fan. I will never forget that night, and the women I will always love.

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