Shelly Part 2 Halloween

After that first night, Rachel and I developed a bond that was closer than the loose friendships among the rest of the group. We began to meet at least once a week to study for Calculus together and would often have lunch after class or simply sit and talk. I learned that she was a Biology major. She took it upon herself to be my mentor, to help me avoid or at least get through all of the mistakes and missteps that everyone made in their first year. There were nights when we would just the two of us would go out together, cruising some of the local hangouts for singles who were under twenty-one years. I talked to a few guys during these outings, but never really came close to a connection.

Mostly, I just watched Rachel. If she had let me, I would have brought a pen and paper to take notes. Rachel would strike up a conversation with anyone, picking out the logo on a tee-shirt, a wristwatch, even an expensive pen or a pair of shoes to comment on. No matter what it was, she seemed to know enough about it to carry on a discussion, often to the delight of the person opposite her. It gave her the semblance of having a personal magnetism, letting her find a common ground with anyone and build upon it. My first impression from the night at the club was that she would chase any guy that so much as looked at her. I came to understand that she was very shrewd in her choice of men, but that she wanted to be sure to give herself the widest possible range of choices. She let me know that this year, she had yet to find a suitable man to even date.

With us, it was my appreciation for Physics and Math that she used to draw me out, at least at first. I could never tell if the First Law of Thermodynamics was really so interesting to her, but it didn’t take long to discover that her understanding of Calculus only went so deep. When we studied together, more often it was me instructing her on a particular formula or theorem. Her strength lay in her memory, in that she could call up seemingly anything she had heard in lecture without having to consult notes or flip through the book. For a time, I valued our friendship more than any other relationship I had to that point experienced in my life.

A few weeks after our first outing, we got together to go out for a movie. “Pay it Forward” was the only film that held even a smidgeon of appeal for us, though Laura defended her wish to see “Bring it On” until the rest of us stood together and gave her a unanimous and unconditional “no”.

We chose a Sunday afternoon showing, which meant that even though it was opening weekend, the theater had ample seating. We went to a spot further back in the theater and filed in. Araceli sat next to the wall with Megan next to her, then me, Rachel, Laura, Casey and Darren. We had gotten two large buckets of popcorn and passed them back and forth while we waited for the lights to dim. Araceli and Megan, as always, acted just like any young couple in love, whispering and giggling to each other while they shared a soda. They had each worn mini skirts, which contrasted with the more relaxed jeans and slacks that the rest of us were wearing.

I settled into my seat as the previews began to roll, feeling good to be out having fun with friends. I looked over at Casey, wondering how her uphill battle against her boyfriend’s resistance was going, but she was simply resting with her head against Darren’s shoulder, though her hand was making suspicious circles around his knee. Laura looked straight ahead at the movie screen, munching slowly on popcorn. I had learned from Rachel that Laura was bisexual and had known Megan from her high school, though the two of them had never dated. Supposedly, she had a long-term girlfriend, but she almost never brought her along on any of their group outings. I glanced over to see Araceli and Megan kiss briefly, then put their foreheads together and giggle again at something I couldn’t hear.

I sat back once more to watch the movie begin. I was a big fan of Kevin Spacey, and though I wouldn’t admit it, Haley Joel Osmont also. It was maybe fifteen minutes into it that I noticed Megan shifting her position next to me. I turned my head just slightly so that I could watch her from the corner of my eye. Megan kept her gaze lifted to the movie screen, but her right hand crept slowly up along Araceli’s leg. She caressed the girl’s thighs down to her knees and back, finally prompting Araceli to uncross her legs. Now her fingers slipped to her inner thigh, still tracing the same path.

One of Araceli’s manicured hands touched Megan’s lips. Still keeping her eyes on the movie, Megan opened her mouth slightly for one of Araceli’s fingers and began to play with it using her lips and tongue. Araceli, silent until now, breathed in deeply, just as Megan’s hand began to explore higher along her leg, pushing back her miniskirt and slipping beneath. I watched, too fascinated to look away. Even though the skirt hid what was going on, I could tell by the motion of her hand that Megan had reached the top of Araceli’s thighs and began to lightly massage the outer lips of her sex.

I felt a change in my body, like the slow uncurling of a flower basking in the heat of the sun. My breathing came rapid and shallow as I watched Araceli’s hand, two fingers now glistening, glide down over Megan’s body and under her skirt, pressing purposefully between her legs. Megan shivered and I could imagine a pleasant chill running down her back at the contact. She closed her eyes and leaned back, a serene smile on her face. Watching her, my body ached to be touched as well, so much that I squirmed in my seat for the slight friction it gave me.

Where are you going with this? I suddenly asked myself, turning away. Is that what you want? A stigma that will haunt you the rest of your life? My preoccupation with girls was nothing more than a silly fantasy. I was letting my desire for freedom and companionship get confused with my desire to explore my suppressed sexuality. But why did I keep coming back to it? Why should Megan’s lifestyle hold such a powerful attraction for me?

A hand touched my own. Startled, I looked down and saw Megan slide her palm under mine and entwine our fingers together. I watched her face as she fell deeper under Araceli’s spell. What was I to Megan? A friend, or the potential for something more? How could I know that when I couldn’t even understand my own feelings?

Megan’s mouth suddenly opened wide and she gripped my hand harder. I could see and feel the tension of her body as she grunted softly through a climax that lasted several seconds. When it was over, she brought Araceli’s fingers to her mouth once more to taste them. She gave me a tiny, lazy smile before slipping down off her chair. I watched, wondering what she could be up to. Keeping her head low, Megan crawled over and knelt between Araceli’s feet. Araceli scooted forward on her seat and opened her legs wider.

“Oh, for the love of fucking Christ,” Rachel said. She had finally caught sight of what was going on between Megan and Araceli. The others looked to see what was happening, but Rachel stood up quickly to block their view. “Come on,” we’re moving,” she said, grabbing my wrist. She moved us about fifteen rows up and on the other side of the aisle. When I looked back, I could only see Araceli, who looked as though she had fallen asleep but was having a particularly good dream.

November approached, bringing with it a palpable sense of relief. For most students, midterms were over and we had at least another month before we had to start studying for finals. It also meant that Halloween was coming, a holiday that freshman students whispered about almost with a kind of reverence. UC santa Barbara had been known for years as an excellent party school, and Halloween represented both the best and worst of that tradition. The day that students looked forward to as the greatest party of the year, I’m certain the police, fire, and ambulance crews unanimously dreaded.

Megan came to Rachel’s room during our study session that week to tell us about the party where we needed to meet her and the others. It didn’t even seem to occur to her that we might have other plans or simply not want to go. I waited for Rachel to promise to be there before I put in my own assent.

I decided to walk to the party, not realizing what a frightening prospect that could be. We were supposed to meet at a house in Isla Vista, a square mile of land next to the university filled with fraternity and sorority houses, apartments, duplexes, and houses packed as closely together as possible. On seemingly every street I passed, there was a party going on, and the house I needed to get to was on the farthest corner from where I had started. Some of the streets in I.V. have almost no lighting at all, and my self-preservation instincts began to tell me that walking was a very stupid idea. I was more relieved than I cared to admit to myself when I reached Del Playa Drive and could see that my destination was just a few houses down.

It looked as though the party had begun early. Plastic cups littered the front yard, and about a dozen people sat in the front yard smoking. Laura was one of them, holding a cup of beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other. I waved to her. “Hey.”

“Hi, babe,” she said, taking a draw of smoke. She passed it over to the asian girl sitting next to her, who took her own pull. Laura blinked her eyes slowly as she blew out a stream of smoke. “Wanna try some?”

“No,” I said quickly. Then I noticed the way the other girl held the tiny stick between two fingers. “Is that marijuana?”

Laura shrugged. “Yeah. You still don’t want any?”

“No thanks.”

“Suit yourself,” Laura drawled. “Hey, you haven’t met Sachi yet, have you? Sachiko, this is Shelly. Shelly, girlfriend.”

“Oh, hi,” I said, holding out my hand.

“Nice to meet you,” Sachi replied, her voice laced with a strong Japanese accent. She put her beer down to shake my hand. Smoke curled up from her nostrils as she spoke again. “Raura told me all about you. She says you’re a genius.” She looked at the joint and waggled it with her fingers. “Probably better not to do this stuff. It make you a little, ah, stupid.”

“I know,” I said, wrinkling my nose at the smell. To Laura, “Is anyone else here yet?”

“Casey and Darren didn’t make it. I think the rest are driving over together. Go get yourself a drink.”

I ventured inside, where probably close to a hundred students were packed into a living and dining room. Music assaulted me, something hip-hop that I didn’t recognize. I edged through the crowd to a table next to the wall where two kegs had been set up. On the table, I found a plastic cup and filled it with the yellow liquid. It looks like piss, I thought. When I took a sip, I nearly choked.

Someone patted me on the back. I looked over at my shoulder. He was close to my own height, with a baby face and a goatee. I didn’t find the combination particularly attractive. “You okay?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” I said, and took another sip of the vile stuff.

“I’m Shawn,” he said. “Pretty sweet party, eh?”

“Yeah,” I said, flashing a smile I wasn’t feeling.

He rolled his hand out, palm up. “And your name is….”

“Shelly.”

“Cool. Did you come with anybody?”

I was starting to wish I’d never opened my mouth. “Yeah, she’s outside. You know Laura?”

“Nope. But that’s cool. So you don’t have a boyfriend?”

“Uh, no,” I said, “not right now.”

“You know you’re very cute.”

I didn’t know what to say to this, so I didn’t say anything. I took a longer sip of the beer. It wasn’t quite as bad as I had thought at first.

“So do you live around here?” Shawn went on.

“I live on campus. Anacapa.”

“Cool. I know some people there. Hey, you wanna sit down?”

I stood on my toes to peer over the heads of the people in the crowd. “I’m kind of waiting for someone.”

“No problem. Let’s go stand by the door.”

I needed to think of a polite way to tell him that I wasn’t interested in him, but nothing came to mind. I couldn’t bring myself to just tell him to get away from me.

“What are you taking?” he asked when we had settled into a spot against the wall.

“Physics.”

“Cool. I’m a Communications major. Who are you waiting for?”

“Megan. Tall girl, blonde.”

“Don’t think I know her.”

You talk too much, I wanted to tell him. Why did I have to be so damned nice? I swirled the last of my beer around. It looked even more like piss now. The last time I had drunk alcohol had given me such a nice feeling, though. Grimacing, I drank the last of it.

“Hey, let me get you another one,” Shawn offered, taking the cup from me.

I looked at my watch. Megan and the others should have been here twenty minutes ago. I thought of slipping away before Shawn noticed, but by then it was too late. He was already making his way back to me.