Rick & Kobe reviews
Well i think that you should use a little more punctuation. I felt like i was reading one big sentence! use some periods every once in while. you would be surprised at how much it effects the story.
The sentence structure was horrible. There was nothing but one run-on sentence after another. I couldn't get into the context of the story becuase of the lack of grammar and sentence stucture.
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The two women had been gabbing about Katie's new apartment and Jack's new job as a civil engineer when Katie cleared her throat, and in a low voice said, "Uh mom, can I ask you a question!?!" "Sure, dear," Fay replied, "ask away!!!" "Well this is really personal," Katie said softly!!!... |
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