I only realized what I had done when I was sitting down. Maybe the change in posture changed how my brain was ticking, or maybe the cold water I ordered helped.

“Oh my god” I whispered.

“Oh don't get all bent out of shape” Lyn murmured, her tail swishing as she sat on the stool, “Barkeep, one cider.”

The 'barkeep' walked to her and pulled a bottle and a cup out from under the bar, pouring her a drink. I gaped, staring at the two of them. I had summoned Lyn a few days ago and she had latched into my brain like a big piece of cinder block dropped from twenty stories up. She had said she wanted to 'help' me. I was getting less and less sure about that.

“Don't worry kid” The barkeep said, seeing my expression, “I see everything. Like Martha's over there” he pointed.

I looked at the seat he pointed too. There was no one there.

“And Gillian is about to appear right next to you”

He was right. A woman suddenly blipped into reality, right next to me, sitting in a barstool with a cup in her hands.

“Oh damn it” She muttered, “Sorry, I'm not supposed to be here till next week”

She blipped out again.

I staired.

“Didn't you notice the sign?” The barkeep pointed at the sign over the door. I squinted and saw that it read: “No soul? Okay”

“Is this a supernatural bar?” I asked Lyn.

“I thought it was a good place to chill out” Lyn murmured in my ear, her lips brushing them. My cock stirred in my pants. That damn ear trick worked every time, and...despite what Lyn had lead me to do recently, I still wanted her.

“I can't believe we did that” I said, looking at the bar and tracing a circle around my cup with my finger, “I mean...I can't believe-”

“Oh quit whining” Lyn said, putting her hands behind her head and stretching her neck, “You enjoyed it, and if Liz was intelligent enough, she enjoyed it too. Not that you gave her the chance”

“I think the only saving grace of this evening is that we blanked her memory” I said.

“Well you still have to learn how to screw a willing woman...preferably an attractive one.” Lyn sipped her cider. “So lets scope the place out”

I looked around. The place was almost abandoned, with only three people in it. One werewolf. No thanks. A single land octopus. Ug. I don't even want to think about that.

And finally one perfectly normal seeming woman, with long red hair that reached her knees, a hat jammed over her head. She was looking around the place like she was stoned, eyes wide.

“That looks good” Lyn murmured, grabbing my shoulder and hauling me to my feet, “Go try her out!”

I walked to the woman and sat down, feeling a little strange. I had already...raped one woman this evening...talking to one couldn't take any more scary. About that Rape...I was really glad Lyn had multiple magical abilities...even more then I thought she would have, being a 'lower' daemon. I'd have to ask her about that eventually.

“Hello” The woman said as I sat down, “Isn't this place incredible! I mean who but humanity would have thought putting ghosts, werewolves, and...a rather attractive deamonnette in the same place”

“Definitely not the orks” I muttered.

“Thats true” The woman said, “What's your name”

“Daniel” I said.

“Arlewen” She said, holding out a fine boned hand to shake mine.

“Thats a...interesting name” I said.

“Thats not what most people said” Arlewen sighed, looking around, “So I was here, thinking about what to do next...I have a bit of a problem”

“What?”

“Well...I have no idea what to research next. See I'm an anthropologist, and for my thesis I've been spending the last few decades in the human cities, study you. I've worked my way from the apples to sewage, but I'm stumped on what to do next”

“Uh...you're a anthropologist that studies humans?”

“Well what could be more fascinating than you guys?” Lyn murmured in my ears.

“I don't mean to alarm you, but you have a deamonnette in your skull” Arlewen said.

“Oh her...just ignore her. Thats what I do” I smiled. Lyn slapped the back of my head, fading out of reality.

“She looked mad” Arlewen said, “and I hope you know who that is”

“Of course I do” I said, “But first, how were you planning to spend the rest of the evening?”

“You know” Arlewen sat up, brightening, “I have a few topics that I haven't been able to research by my lonesome. Can you help me?”

“Uh...okay” I said.

“Well...we should talk in private” Arlewen said, standing. She gestured to the door and we both walked out. We walked towards a apartment block, Arlewen scratching her head as she walked.

“So...where are you from?” I asked as we arrived at her apartment.

“Valenwood” Arlewen pulled her hat off, revealing two long, pointed ears. I couldn't say I was surprised, but I was definitely excited.

“I heard thats a nice place. I always wanted to visit”

“Oh” Arlewen shrugged, “It's okay, I suppose”

She gestured around the apartment. This really surprised me. Paper was piled every where, not even tied up in orderly bundles. Papers on the bed, papers on the walls, paper on the floor. I looked at the ground, seeing that the paper was scrawled with diagrams and carefully lettered English. I picked one of the papers up and read:

“-a interesting quirk of humanity is their bizarre views of other races and nations. Even other humans are seen as strange and alien. The cultural dichotomy between, say, a Oriental and a Caucasian can be incredible, as great the gap as between an Elf and an Ork...”

“So...you've been researching us for fifty years?” I asked.

“Yes” Arlewen said, sitting down on her bed after brushing some papers aside, “I almost got carpel tunnel syndrome before I got that”

She pointed at a quill pen, which lifted into the air and moved to a blank sheet of paper, poised and ready.

“So...the first thing we need to discuss is this strange human practice called masturbation”

I blinked, ears reddening. For a second I wondered if Lyn was making this, another one of her befuddling illusions.

“No such luck, honey” Lyn murmured in my head, “You're gonna have to bite the bullet”

“Now I've studied female masturbation” Arlewen said, smiling demurely, “Now that...that was fun...but because I'm not a man, I really need a life test subject”

“Well” I said, feeling Lyn prod my back with her claw, “I suppose I can do that”

“First question!” Arlewen said, “What 'turns you on'”

“Uh...” I stammered, “Interracial, lesbians...some kinky things”

“Interracial...as in?”

“Uh” I blushed, remembering the single porn video that had really got me going, “Elf and human”

“Oh...do I turn you on?”

I looked at my feet. “Yes”

“Does this turn you on?”

I looked up and saw that Arlewen slowly kneading her tits with both her hands, her demure smile growing to something very lustful.

I nodded, my jaw not working. Arlewen smiled, looking at the pen. It started to write a flurry of words and diagrams. It went through a few pages, going to another in a split second.

“Now...how do you normally masturbate?”

“Well” I said, unbuttoning my pants, “I first take my pants off”

Arlewen laughed, “Of course”

“Then I take my cock in my hands” I said, doing so, “Usually I'm watching a porno...”

My cock was a bit limp now that Arlewen was staring at me, expectant and egar...but not for sex, for knowledge. She had dropped her lustful smile and her pen was paused, waiting for me to continue.

I sighed, “Arlewen, I need some...stimulus to get my a hard on”

“Well you said you liked interracial and lesbian...hmmm” Arlewen said, looking at the celling.

“Let me handle this” Lyn murmured, stepping in front of me.

“You're back” Arlewen sighed, “Do you mind, we're trying to-”

Lyn kissed her, pushing the elf backwards into the bed. Lyn's tails swished back and forth in the air as she kissed Arlewen again, clasping the elf's head. Lyn turned her head and kissed Arlewen's left ear.

I was very hard suddenly, as Lyn pulled Arlewen back to a sitting position. The elf looked completely shocked, her nipples rock hard against her shirt.

“Oh” Arlewen said, “That was...interesting”

“Notice how he is inflamed” Lyn murmured, slipping behind Arlewen, her tail brushing through papers, sending them scattering to the floor, “He definitely finds this erotic”

“Do you?” Arlewen asked, “If so, what part?”

“Uh yes” I stammered, my hand still around my cock, “And I really like how she pushed you down, like you didn't really want it, but then you kind of liked it”

“Involuntary” Arlewen sighed, “That is interesting”

“Now, Daniel, how do you like...this” Lyn murmured. Her tail swished around and slid up Arlewen's front, from her tummy to between her ample tits. The tail, as prehensile as always, circled around Arlewen's left tit and squeezed. Arlewen breathed in, her teeth bared.

“Oh” I breathed, “Thats...hot”

“Arlewen” Lyn murmured, “is this making you hot?”

“Yes” Arlewen hissed, “I've never felt this way...even when in heat!”

“Forbidden fruit” Lyn said, reaching around and undoing the buttons on Arlewen's shirt, “You would never sleep with a woman, would you?”